Bujold Filk

[elisem]

In honor of stakebait, here's a filk song about Miles Vorkosigan, a character from the fictional universe of Lois McMaster Bujold.

THE ACCIDENTAL ADMIRAL
written 9/19/96 by Elise Matthesen

He is the very model of an Accidental Admiral
Familiar with the frying-pan, the fire and the free-for-all;
He's chummy with the Emperor -- won't let him get morose again --
And when the intrigue starts to wane, just call in Miles Vorkosigan.

He's very well acquainted, too, with matters of security;
The overwhelming menace in his motives is their purity;
His hyperactive habits are believed to be incurable,
But actually they're useful, for they make him pretty durable.

He's very good with justice and occasions magisterial
And he's a Vor that one can trust with matters quite Imperial;
So whether it's a picnic, an invasion or a free-for-all
He is the very model of an Accidental Admiral.

At moments of excitement one can see him flailing frantically
(It's possible in combat but it's likelier romantically)
He idolized Elena and was hoping he could marry her
But didn't know her warrior ambitions were a barrier;

He brought in Trainee Taura, who is like a Wookie Amazon
(He got her into uniform but likes her with pajamas on)
His ship's so full of women you'd mistake it for a nunnery --
But one where all the sisters are superior at gunnery.

Some think that he's a Vorish twit, effete and egotistical,
Some feel for him a reverence that borders on the mystical,
But whether it's in fealty, in fieldwork or a free-for-all,
He is the very model of an Accidental Admiral.

Subordination's difficult -- he's had all he can stand of it --
But point him at a problem and he's sure to take command of it.
And as for plans alternative he's sure to have a million;
His little mind's so devious, he croggles Simon Illyan.

And Illyan's who receives the tales of matters mercenarial,
In masterful reports of obfuscation actuarial,
For Miles is mayhem's magnet -- this conclusion's ineluctable --
And Simon is considering a hike in his deductible.

So when it comes to mercenary's luck and synchonicity,
From galaxy to galaxy, from war to infelicity,
You're bound to find Vorkosigan a-grinnin' in the free-for-all:
He is the very model of an Accidental Admiral.

(That's copyright Elise Matthesen, 1996. Reprints by written permission of the author only; for permissions and other information, please contact elise@lioness.net, or leave a comment here. Thank you!)

Comments

[janetmiles.livejournal.com]

Wonderful!

It's probably rude to ask, but is it possible that more verses might be written at some point?

[elisem.livejournal.com]

Glad you like!


As to more verses: well, possibly, but only just barely so. And if so, none of them would cover events after the point at which Miles ceased to be an admiral, so no Komarr, no Ekaterin, and so forth.

If, however, Miles were to become an admiral again sometime, I'd write another verse or two.

[rmjwell.livejournal.com]

*applause*

Have you got an update in the works for Miles's later adventures?

Certainly finding a rhyme for "Ekaterin" would be daunting. :-)

[vass]

Smatterin', scatterin, patterin'...

[elflet.livejournal.com]

On a mission to Komarr he met the dear Ekaterin,
Whose man's demise brought 'round Vor lords all bent upon a-flatterin'...

(dangit, now I'm looking for a way to rhyme Skellytum...)

[elisem.livejournal.com]

See later response wherein the sad truth is revealed....

[skylarker.livejournal.com]

That looks fun to sing - if only I had more than a passing acquaintance with the tune.

[xiphias.livejournal.com]

This (http://math.boisestate.edu/gas/pirates/html/p13.html) may help.

[skylarker.livejournal.com]

Thanks! With Elise's permission (Elise?) the Mpls 4th Saturday Filkers may try singing it this weekend.

[elisem.livejournal.com]

Good heavens, yes; go for it! Permission granted, bigtime.

[micheinnz.livejournal.com]

::wild applause::

[metabutch.livejournal.com]

Oh my goodness I now feel compelled to propose to you, Elise!

That was beautiful and perfect in so many ways. In every way!

*fans zirself off*

[elisem.livejournal.com]

*wink*
*curtsy*

Sir, you are too, too kind.

[rivka.livejournal.com]

Elise, you are marvelous.

[stakebait.livejournal.com]

BWAH!!!!!!!!

I adore you. May I link this in lmbujold?

Mer

[elisem.livejournal.com]

Way totally; go for it.

I wrote it a number of years to go, after the author was talking with various folks about titles for omnibus editions of various novels. She was amused, which was gratifying.

There are some other Gilbert and Sullivan filks, but most of them are very, very silly things done for a semi-annual Guy Fawkes Day party at Neil Gaiman's house. Filksongs for that party are not limited to Gilbert and Sullivan material, either. Far funnier than mine are the ones by my dear Mr. Ford, of which the most extensive takes advantage of a fortuitous typo Neil made one year in the invitation. (Um, the Gunpowder Plot is a lot sillier if one moves it back 1000 years... and then retells it as "Guys and Bombs" to the music of, yes, "Guys and Dolls.") The most useful of Mr. Ford's Guy Fawkes' Day Party filks is the one to a Don McLean tune, and therefore called "American Guy," which has a classified verse which contains the driving directions to Neil's house. (I have been in several excursions where that verse was sung in order to navigate successfully.) Geri Sullivan reprinted the song (minus the directions verse) in Idea a while ago, which was a lot of fun. She put my silly G&S songs in that issue too, which was sweet of her.

[elisem.livejournal.com]

I hasten to add that filksongs are not the point of that particular party. They arose accidentally, with a (so far) mercifully limited selection of malefactors perpetrating them.

The point of the party is, to borrow the final verse from Mike Ford's song:

"I met a girl who fiddled fine
And she handed me some sparkling wine
(Outside, the champagne's always chilled)
Upon the kindling, Guy stands straight
As annually he meets his fate
The host ignites the fire, we watch it build
And in the yard we take our stations
Awaiting the illuminations
Foggy conversations
Then colored conflagrations
And the words we most admire to say
Light Blue Touchpaper, Get Away
They'll get a workout on the day
The night we light the fuse
And we'll be singing

Remember, remember, the fifth of November
It was a night full of gunpowder, treason and plot
I see no reason
Why a gunpowder treason
Ever, ever should be forgot
Ever, ever should be forgot....

--John M. Ford

"Foggy conversations (http://dd-b.lighthunters.net/cgi-bin/picpage.cgi/gallery/Guy%20Fawkes%20Day%201994/i326-6.jpg)/And colored conflagrations (http://dd-b.lighthunters.net/cgi-bin/picpage.cgi/gallery/Guy%20Fawkes%20Day%202002/ddb%20200211%20060-36A.jpg)" is a beautiful line, and it captures that gathering well. Every time I hear it, I am back there.

[stakebait.livejournal.com]

Um, the Gunpowder Plot is a lot sillier if one moves it back 1000 years... and then retells it as "Guys and Bombs" to the music of, yes, "Guys and Dolls."

*blink* I imagine it would be. I think I just sprained my brain.

And singing directions is genius -- if they rhymed, I might actually remember them.

Mer

[scimon.livejournal.com]

That's just amazing.

[azurelunatic]

Oh! Thank you for posting this again. I had just barely come onlist when you posted it the first time, and have been searching for it now and then in the tricksy archives ever since...

[ainm.livejournal.com]

That's absolutely fantastic!!

[keswindhover.livejournal.com]

Most amusing, and admirably clever.

And a couple of new verses doing justice to Ekaterin, butterbugs and the quaddies would be wonderful.

[elisem.livejournal.com]

Thank you; I am very glad you enjoyed it.

People often ask about new verses, and I just sigh and say that it's not going to happen, folks. Miles is no longer an admiral, and that particular song is for when he was.

However, it is possible there will be other songs. One never knows, especially where Miles is concerned.

[erin-c-1978.livejournal.com]

Oh, I love this. Very clever.